Take your first steps towards Happiness!
We are going through an emotional storm that makes our securities fragile, affects our strongest foundations: health, life, family, work, money. It creates fear and uncertainty and forces us to change. Never as in these days, it is important to bring happiness in our lives and to start from ourselves. Most of us are living in self-isolation, others are experiencing the lockdown, in these days we can choose to focus on fear or decide to look back on our path and take advantage of the opportunity to make changes that can make us happier.
Are you ready to give yourself a KISS?
K.I.S.S. is the abbreviation of four keywords: Keep, Improve, Start, Stop. Each of these terms brings with it a question that can quickly help you to assess your behaviour with respect to happiness. It is a very effective tool that, thanks to the help of simple questions, allows you to draw up a list of good habits, suggestions for improvement, and also to highlight actions, situations and behaviours to start or stop.
The uses of the K.I.S.S. can be multiple. I use it in training as much as in individual or group coaching, and it can be applied to personal and business issues. Once learned, you can use it in your own way for your activities, goals, behaviours. The questions are oriented towards action and allow you to identify the changes to be made and give energy to new impulses. And let’s not forget that if you are able to identify and put into practice the necessary changes in your life with your own strength, you will have a huge head start towards achieving your goals.
The process
The KISS process is a simple series of questions designed to provide practical insights on what is working well and encourages investigation for what could be done better. It enables to focus on those activities and situations you want to change. I propose some questions for each of the elements. which of course are not exhaustive, but only a trace to start.
Before starting, take a pen and download the workbook you can find below, reserve some time to reflect and treat yourself setting a cosy space and with a cup or a glass of your favourite drink.
Ask the right questions
KEEP – This first step allows you to make a list of good habits and allows recognizing and appreciating the results. What are you doing well and you need to keep doing in order to achieve Happiness?
- What I already do that makes me happy?
- What makes me feel good?
- What people, activities, places, situations fulfil me?
We all have activities and situations that make us happy which must be carried out: these must clearly be identified and remain in place. But this is also an opportunity to recognise the things you are already doing which help to feel happy. In fact, this initial stage is deceptively important because, even though it doesn’t necessarily lead to change, it reinforces awareness and relevance of those activities which must continue.
IMPROVE – This second step allows you to make a program on how to improve things already present in your life. What are you already doing that could be improved to make you even happier?
- What could I increase to improve my level of well-being?
- How can I change a situation so that I can feel more comfortable?
This step prompts an evaluation of what is already in place in order to see where improvements could be made. Activities and situations can be reviewed allowing problem areas to be identified and you could decide on which areas need to be addressed and the most effective way to achieve improvements.
START – This third step allows you focusing on what you want to bring into your life: What do you need to start doing that you haven’t been doing?
- What am I not doing and should I start doing to be happy?
- What is the first step to take to meet my desires?
- What can I add to my life?
- What can I start doing that brings well-being in my relationships?
- How can I start doing to take care of myself?
The answer to these questions points to gaps in the current situation. To move forward and improve, it is important to carefully look inside yourself and look for what you need to start doing. This can also be an extremely energising process but may require careful reflection: do any of the activities or behaviours prompt a feeling of failure or anxiety? To succeed you should recognise why you haven’t addressed these areas in the past and what you can do to overcome a possible reluctance to start.
STOP – This last step helps you understand what has become too much and can become a weight that does not allow you to move forward in bringing happiness your life: What do you need to stop doing – either because it no longer contributes to making yourself feel good or is no longer effective?
- What do I need to stop, both because it prevents me from being happy and because it is no longer suitable for me?
- What situations do I need to let go of?
- Which objects are no longer useful to me?
- What habits are toxic to me?
By asking the question “what needs to stop?” – i.e. which practices are counterproductive – you will remain focused, empowered and motivated and you will raise your energy level.
The Action Plan
At the end of the process, make a list of priorities and focus only on the first one of each element. A recurring problem in executing a plan effectively is an unrealistic number of goals. If everything is a priority, then often very little is actually accomplished. Better a few things to focus on and that we can achieve, than an infinite list of “I would like … but I can’t do it”. Once an action or behaviour has been carried out, celebrate the result and move on to the first action on the list that was excluded from the first choice, and so on.
Revisit and revise
From time to time, when you have achieved most of your goals, or when you feel you need to refocus on what you want to change to bring more happiness in your life, go again through the KISS process and set a new action plan.
Ready for a Kiss to your Happiness?
Download the Workbook and go through the process. I look forward to hearing about your plan, book a free discovery call to have my personal review on your KISS.